Today is Easter for those who celebrate. And it's also International Day of Transgender Visibility. This is not lost on me. In fact, I think it's pretty poignant.
Easter used to be one of my favorite days of the year. For me, it's the official Spring kick off. I reminisce about new pastel dresses, full Easter baskets, family gatherings, delicious food. I think about the end of Lent where you gorge yourself on whatever you gave up--chocolate, ice cream, social media. I think a lot about my parents on holidays. Both struggled to figure out parenthood during my childhood, but the one thing they truly excelled at was holidays.
As a struggling single parent, money was tight, but our Mom always found fun small things to fill our baskets. When I was young it was a new pair of jacks, a paddle ball, yo-yo and jump rope. At our Dad's, they dispensed with traditional baskets and went full on with large gift boxes filled with plastic Easter grass, candy and always cash. The larger the chocolate bunny or decorated chocolate egg the better. Our uncle owned a popular pharmacy on the east side of town, so our stepmom stocked up on the good stuff. No hollow bunnies for her.
When I became a parent, I took the challenge of Easter basket filling very seriously. I would hunt and hunt for just the right gifts. Always going overboard, their special Easter surprises usually spilled over, but that was all part of the excitement. Mike's family had the fun tradition of hiding baskets for the kids to find Easter morning. This is one of my favorite holiday memories! Watching our three rambunctious tykes run around, usually in just a diaper or underwear, was pure joy for me.
Spiritually, the story of Jesus rising from the dead captures my imagination. If I'm honest, I was a doubting Thomas more than I wasn't, but I've always been drawn to a good redemption story--the idea of starting over. A rebirth. I also love the concept of faith--believing what's in your heart even when your brain screams that it doesn't make sense. Blind faith guided me most of my life when I could rarely make sense of my reality. It would become most useful when we learned our middle child was transgender.
Coming out as trans is the ultimate redemption story. Peeling away the former version of you--the version everyone came to know--in order to give new life to your one true self. Trans folk encounter many doubting Thomases along the way. But then there are those who see and believe without hesitation. My husband and I were the doubters of our family. Initially struggling to see Allison in her truth. Trying to make sense of things. Searching for facts. Following our brains and not our hearts. Our other children saw her from go. Their hearts knew and were the first to recognize her as she emerged from the tomb of despair.
When we could no longer make it make sense, we both landed squarely in a faith that chose to believe in her and her belief in herself. We were eyewitnesses to her resurrection and saw her new life blossom into something truly beautiful and remarkable. The miracle of a life raised from the dark.
Transgender Day of Visibility is the day we set aside each year to celebrate the resurrection of trans people across the globe. We honor and validate their rebirth, and the new life they represent in their daily lives. To be visible as a trans person in today's charged anti-trans climate is nothing short of courageous. We honor and celebrate the day. We share the stories of trans people in the hopes that one day it's no longer needed because trans people are able to live their lives fully out of the shadows and without fear of persecution.
Like most families of LGBTQ+ children, religion conjurs a mess of emotions. So many of us have been cast aside. But on the holiest day of the year in the Christian calendar, I can't help but think about how Jesus would treat our families, and our trans loved ones in particular. I believe that the one who welcomed the outcast would be among the first to bear witness to their truth. He would see their humanity above all else--no labels or days of visibility needed. They would be fully visible to him. Today, I honor the one who preached "love one another as I have loved you" while celebrating the lives of transgender people everywhere.
Happy resurrection day! And Happy Easter to all those who celebrate!